As 2015 was named the International Year of Light, I decided early that I would have my own Year of Light. Mine would have less to do with illumination and more to do with weight—household weight. If possible, I wanted to lighten the load of domestic stuff—and stuffedness—around the house. At the very least, I wanted it to be a zero-addition year.

I look around and don’t really see a grandly discernible difference. I know I didn’t spend the whole year with my resolution in mind and I certainly didn’t factor it into my calendar or list of tasks to do. I also know I succeeded at the base level because I didn’t keep adding and adding. And there are spots where I have quietly succeeded, which is pleasing.

But I see the biggest change when I look in the mirror and see my personal Year of Light outcome as a living, breathing person … a lighter, healthier person physically and, at last, one who is seeing the light mentally as well, looking at thoughts and refusing to carry them for too long when they are the kind of thoughts that can have a detrimental effect.

I have discovered that if a thought occurs to me and I allow it to pass without grabbing it and inviting it in to stay, that thought will simply float away. It will be as light as air and continue on its journey without me. On the other hand, a thought that I take hold of and then harbour within me can anchor me to an unending hamster wheel of unease and even unhappiness. Described that way, it becomes pretty obvious that thoughts deserve freedom. If I don’t shackle a certain thought, keep it prisoner and feed it, that thought will simply not have a home with me … not become part of me … and therefore will have no power over me. That’s a lightbulb moment if ever there was one.

Someone said to me the other day, “Two steps forward and one step back is still heading in the right direction.”

Such a simple concept, but it reminded me of how much negative self-talk some of us use when we have strayed from our absolute ideal. We have this concept that it has to be perfection or bust. And many of us choose ‘bust’ because perfection is pretty damn hard.

From the vantage point of heading in the right direction, suddenly there is less guilt, less conflict, less worry … and less likelihood of giving up.

From a diet point of view, you take the step backward and enjoy whatever you’ve decided to indulge in. At the next meal you’re back on track. No need to try to compensate for the indulgence—let it stand on its own. Just get back to your ‘best scenario’ food immediately afterwards.

Let’s face it. One step backward isn’t going to derail the train. It can even be considered as a breather from the relentless march forward.

And if you’re never prepared to take a step backwards, how will you ever learn the cha cha?